I Never Leave Home Without My Tension Diffuser

Babies can help you out with the following routine tasks:

1. canceling plans
2. leaving places early
3. coming up with topics of conversation
4. tactful and graceful invitation refusals




1. Babies are an excellent excuse to cancel plans.  I've always enjoyed canceling plans.  The only thing that's more satisfying than making plans.....is canceling plans.  Relief just gushes out of you-

me (in the act): 'Oh man, Poppy is being cranky and/or fussy*, I don't think that we can make your outdoor July 4th celebration.  Maybe next year.' 

translation ––––––>  'It's 99 degrees and you don't have a pool.'

2. You can use babies to get you outta there when you feel like leaving but you know that you shouldn't yet:

hypothetical lady at a party:  'Shoot, just got a text from the sitter.  We've got to head home.  The crab cakes and wine were excellent!' 

or, if the baby is with you at said social event:

hypothetical lady at a party:  'Son of a gun, how time does fly.  It's getting to be baby's bedtime.'  

3. Babies are quite useful in social situations that may have otherwise been awkward – they diffuse the conversational gaps.  When there's a baby around, there's always something to focus on. 

4. Have you ever accepted an invitation to an event out of obligation?  Do you ever wish that you had a tactful way to be more selective and discerning?  Well, look no further, I've got just the excuse for you: babies.  



(Sidebar: Puppies have the ability to accomplish all of the above and you don’t have to send them to college.  Just something to think about.)

Bouncing Babies at Bookmarks

Welcome to another largely plotless episode of the Poppy O. Show.  Poppy and I went to this thing today called Baby Bounce Basics.  It takes place at a branch of the Dallas Public Library called Bookmarks.  This is of course the branch of the library that's in the mall, it still counts though.  Why wouldn't the library be in the mall*?  

There was this nice lady named Kim leading the children and their mothers (clad exclusively in stretchy exercice-wear) in predictably commonplace song including the itsy bitsy spider, twinkle twinkle little star, happy birthday, humpty dumpty, and the like.  Poppy and I went from comfortably numb to apathetic somewhere around the third song – at which point Poppy stopped shaking her egg shaker instrument.  

I got through the second half of this 20 minute gathering by staring at the escalator imagining how funny it would be to have Matt place Poppy on the descending escalator with me down at the bottom of the escalator shooting a video.  

I wonder if she'd sit still on that moving step...

I guess Poppy and I are just spoiled from Music Together where one never hears these cliché nursery songs sung by questionable cover bands.  Nope, at Music Together we sing original songs like Betty Martin, Hippity Happity Hoppity and Round Robin.  Betty Martin is our fave this semester.

http://dallaslibrary2.org/branch/bookmarks.php?

Baby Bounce Basics
When: Monday, June 17, 2013 - 10:30 AM
Where: Bookmarks (in the NorthCourt)
Atmos Energy presents delightful fun for moms/caregivers and infants up to 24 months with interactive music, nursery rhymes and stories! 

Wiggly, Waggly Words
When: Wednesday, June 19, 2013 - 3:30 PM
Where: Bookmarks (in the Storytime Steps inside Bookmarks)
Atmos Energy presents an interactive storytime featuring movement, rhymes, music and books for age 7 and under.

*It makes sense that the baby library is at the mall.  As a modern mom, I am generally more comfortable with material items than I am with babies.  And judging by the sizable stroller crowd at the mall library today, I'm not the only one.  

A Signature Life

I picked up Diane von Furstenberg's 1998 biography whilst shopping at her Soho store last week.  It was something she said in a 2012 Gap Kids campaign video inspired me to buy it:  
'A little girl the minute she is born is already the woman she will be. So to empower a little girl is to empower the woman she will become.'                                            -Diane Von Furstenburg  

'i started as a very young girl with an idea.'

Now that I've read her biography I'm seriously determined to meet this woman.  Her book is interesting for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that she talks about her insecurities.  She also talks about her European parenting style. Here are some quotes that I highlighted:

'I design for every woman: taste is ageless.  Flirtation and seduction are ageless.  Feeling attractive and confident are ageless–and so are many women's insecurities.  Nothing gives me greater pleasure than seeing a woman transformed by the way she looks in one of my dresses.'  

'I would always make a point of treating my children with respect as individuals.  I pride myself now on the fact that I never lied to the children.  We shared our lives, be we were all independent.'




The chapter entitled The Woman I Always Wanted To Be  describes her rationale for taking her 2 children out of their NYC schools and installing them at private schools in Connecticut.  She saw the advantages of a little boredom:  

'Every day was super-managed with one activity after another, leaving them no time to simply be.  I wanted my children to develop their imaginations and their personalities by entertaining themselves instead of always being entertained.'



It was around that time that Diane's home in Connecticut became a hub of happiness for her kids and their friends.  I love her attitude about the untidiness that came with that: 

'I didn't mind the mess the children and their friends made in the house...It was more important to me to know where my children were and to know their friends.'

Here's a post I did last year about DVF's first Baby Gap collection:
http://www.poppyadventures.com/2012/11/why-bad-outfits-shouldnt-happen-to-good.html

Her 2013 collection for Gap Kids is called the Explorers  Collection:
http://www.gap.com/browse/category.do?cid=94065


Read Bazaar's My List: Diane von Furstenberg in 24 Hours:
http://www.harpersbazaar.com/fashion/fashion-articles/24-hours-with-diane-von-furstenberg-0313?click=main_sr#slide-1

'What Are Those People Doing In There Mommy?'

I love those smoking lounges in airports, especially the ones in American airports.  The ones in American airports seem even weirder, even more anachronistic.  Here you have this big room with big windows, and the passersby are peering inside as if it were a museum installation.  All that’s missing is the little sign saying:

‘This is what life was like in the fifties.’

That's what I'll tell Poppy when she asks about these dens. 

older Poppy: 'Wow...real live smokers!'

me: 'No, it's just a 3D exhibit.  People don't really smoke anymore.'

Don’t Hover

One of the big take-aways in Pamela Druckerman’s Bébé Day By Day: 100 Keys to French Parenting is that autonomy is crucial for children.  When a mother hovers over her child too much in France, someone is apt to say: 'Just let him live his life!'

This means that French mothers generally do drop-off playdates: 'French parents don't feel they must supervise another adult's supervision of their child, or stick around to reassure the child herself.  They make sure that they're in good hands, then they leave.  Usually they're invited back for coffee or cocktails at the end'. 

We like to hang out with our friends the Romanians.  We call them the Romanians because they are from Romania, and also because whenever I say ‘we’re going to hang out with the Romanians tonight’ it kinda sounds like we are going to hang out with an eastern-block rockband.  They’re not a band, which is okay because they do have a 1.75 year old son (baby Romania).  Matt, Poppy and I go Chez Romania on Friday nights and it’s great – Baby Romania and Poppy get along well together, the Romanians have a back yard, a grill, etc..  People who have offspring tend to spend time with other people who have offspring; the kids entertain themselves as the mothers hovernearby drinking wine and talking about the babies.  The men are always farther away from the children than the women are, and they're discussing business, not babies.  This situation creates a charming little culture that I adore being a part of.     

Will You Take Care of This Baby? (part 2 of many)

All chapters come to an end, but sometimes you wish they wouldn't.  One such chapter is Poppy's Mini-Mustang Land.  

SMU Preschool and Childcare Center is a dream institution by anyone's standards – it's a land of learning, a land of love, a land of low teacher-to-student ratios (in the infant room the ratio is 1:2, there are 2 teachers and 4 infants.  Excellent.)   It is recommended that SMU's students and faculty who want to put their kids here get on the wait list 2 to 3 years in advance.  

mini-mustang land

It was last December when I found out that one of my spring classes was going to be an 8:00am-er.  This meant that on-campus childcare would be ideal (more than ideal really).  I had not put Poppy on the wait list 2 to 3 years in advance.  So I decided to go sing my plight to the Director lady of SMU Preschool and Childcare Center.  She happened to be outside when I approached Hawk Hall on that crisp/chirpy December morning.  I recognized her as the Director lady from 100 yards away*. 

me: 'Hello, are you Miss Julie?'

Director lady: 'Why yes I am.'

me: 'I thought that you looked like her.  You look like someone who is accustomed to being approached by mothers who need someone to look after their children.'

Director lady:  [stares blankly]

me: 'The thing is that I was wondering if I could leave my baby here with you while I'm in class next semester.  She'll be 7 months old.'

[I pause to give her a look conveying that I am very nice and also very deserving of her services.] 

me: 'I'm sure you're full, but maybe I could get on a wait list or something?'

Director lady: 'Well that wouldn't do you any good, there are 43 babies on the wait list and there is space for only 4 babies total in the center.'

me: 'It would only be this one semester, Poppy and I are off to grad school after that.'

Director lady: 'So it would be only for Spring 2013, January through May?'

me: 'Oh yes, uh-huh, only one semester.  My daughter and I are going to graduate school after that.  It is just a very short amount of time.  And my baby is VERY well-behaved.  I'm sure that  all parents who are trying to get in here say that, but my baby really is well-behaved.  I wouldn't say that if it weren't true.  Promise.'

Director lady: 'Well, let me get your number...'

I hand her my envelope with Poppy's application in it, and try to give her the check for the application fee.

Director lady: 'No, I don't want to take your check yet.  But, since it'd only be for a short time, maybe there is something I could do.'

She recites their tuition schedule.

me: 'Oh, yes, that's fine.  I can go ahead and pay a deposit....'

Director lady: 'Well, let me talk to my supervisor and get back to you by Wednesday.'

me: 'Perfect.  That would be AMAZING!  Thank you so much!'

eggs

'where are the eggs?'

I didn't think that I'd find a place like this to put The Pop-Tart.  The following is an email thread from the middle of the Spring semester: 


me: 'SMU childcare has been the most perfect situation ever for us.  And remember that one morning...I told you that she was a good/well-behaved baby whilst begging for a spot!  (lol)'

Director lady (aka Miss Julie): 'It all worked out for the best and you touched my heart!!!!! I knew we were meant to "run" into each other that morning!!  You sold yourself the right way........LOL!'  




The semester has ended, so it is now time for Poppy and I to ride on to our next adventure...

*These women are generally pretty easy to spot.  Directors of childcare centers are important people.  I've met three of these ladies so far, and I gotta tell ya, they have been strikingly similar.  The ones whom I've met have all been jovial/jolly, confident, ample types who add liberal amounts of hairspray to their hairdos.  I love these women even though they intimidate the heck out of me.  

Disco Dancin'

In general, we are still a bit unsure of what we're supposed to do with Poppy.  Yesterday Matt, Poppy and I went to Music Together's Summer Luau Disco Party (and yes, it's exactly what is sounds like it is).  

Poppy was initially intimidated by all the people and all the ruckus.     

'oh my goodness mommy, what's all this about?'

'who are all these people?'

'okay, i'll dance if you hold me'

'okay, i'm fine now mommy,
you can put me down.  let's do this thing.'

The Pop-Tart is freed from the shackles of intimidation, and I spend the rest of the hour hovering as her dancing bodyguard to make sure she doesn't get stepped on. 

http://www.musictogetherdallas.com/